Well I'm one day away from leaving Washington. Last weekend I got to go to a staff reunion for Youth Dynamics Adventures, in Leavenworth. There were summer staff there from 25 years ago, including the founder. Unfortunately, no one from my first summer was there, so that was kind of sad (Next time we need to represent! You know who you are). But it was a great weekend and plenty of old friends, from my second summer and beyond were there. On Sunday I finally got to climbing without dealing with rain, hail, or getting lost. My friend Miranda and I climbed in the morning and I finally got to do Classic Crack, a famous crack climb in Icicle Canyon. Another friend, Kurtis came to join us after he whitewater kayaked Tumwater Canyon in the morning. Eventually Miranda had to get back to the ranch for a trip (she's on summer staff this summer).
Kurtis and I tried to find a 2 pitch 5.4 trad route that we saw in the guid book. To translate, that means it takes two rope lengths to complete it. Grade 5 climbing requires both hands and feet and as the number increase after the decimal, the climb gets harder. For example, a 5.3-5.5 is pretty easy, most beginner can start with 5.6 or so, if the climb is top roped (which means the anchor is already set for you). The hardest climb I've ever done is a 5.10 and the hardest climb ever done is 5.14. "Trad" is short for traditional, which means that instead of having an anchor already at the top, or having bolts screwed into the rock that you clip into as you climb (sport climbing), you bring pieces of gear that you wedge into cracks that act as mini-anchors as you climb. It is more challenging than sport climbing because it takes longer to place the gear, and you have to trust every placement that you make.
I am just learning how to trad climb so we picked an easy one. It turned out that to get to the offical climb we had to climb 3 pitches of about 5.4 terrain to get to the base of the actual route. So the whole thing took longer than we thought but it was really fun. The last couple of times I had gone trad climbing in the spring, I was really getting frustrated because I felt like I couldn't trust my gear, but I was trying to climb harder routes so I would get sketched out. I lowered off of the first 5.8 I tried trad, which made me trust that one piece of gear holding me. And I down climbed off of a 5.7 within a couple weeks of eachother. So I was starting to get pretty frustrated, especially since I can climb stuff like that easily sport or top roped. So maybe the two month break from it was enough to separate myself from the frustration. And I purposly picked something ridiculously easy so that I wouldn't get freaked out. It wasn't till halfway into the climb that I realized that I was just having fun, I wasn't worried, I wasn't scared. And I was learning. We would give eachother feedback on our anchors and gear placements, which was encouraging and I just got to pactice the transitions between pitches and good stuff like that. Oh yeah, and I finally got to use the cams I bought with my graduation money. It was pretty rad!
I completely forgot to take my camera out all weekend but hopefully I'll be able to highjack pictures from other people.
Last week I was getting pretty stressed out about my move to Austria. I'm excited about being there but I have this dread in the back of my mind that makes me wonder if it's going to be like my host family situation when I was in Germany. When people ask me what it was like bing an exchange student in Germany for a year, fun is not the first word that comes to mind. Challenging, testing, arduous come to mind first. Much of what was amazing about about that year is sort of soured by the difficulty I had geting along with my host family. I went in thinking that I was a pretty easy person to get along with and that I was flexible and willing and able to make things work even if they aren't ideal. I got along with the two littl girls and the dad but it seemed like there was always something I could do a little different or a little better before the mom would be content. This was exasperated by a couple of misunderstandings after Christmas time. The bike they were letting me use got stolen while I had it locked up at the bus stop and even though I said I would pay for it, she went on about how it was their son bike, they trusted me,... There were a couple other misunderstandings and by that point I was getting a bit depressed and was talking less, so that's when my host mom decided that using the silent treatment on me would solve the problem. She literally wouldn't answer me if I talked to her unless it was absolutely necessary. It was so absured. Anyway, I finally decided to change host families, and had a really great last couple months with the Mingers.
Even though I know that that was a unique situation (hopefully!) it makes me apprehensive about the coming year. I don't want to have misunderstandings with the teachers in my school, I want to get along with my landlady, I want to meet people and makes friends and find a good church and feel connected. It takes so much time though. Just about when you are starting to feel comfortable somewhere, it's time to move on. It happened when I was in Germany; I really got close to my friends on a trip we took on spring break, and I found a good church a month before I left. Then I started over again when I went to community college for a year. By the time I strted as Western I was ready to got comfortable somewhere and hang a round for a while. And I really did. I love Bellingham, the people, the place. I miss being there already, I miss all my B'ham friends and old housemates already. I love being in a town that feels like home, and that's what Bellingham is for me. Long runs on the Interurban Trail watching the sun set over the San Juan islands, BBQs and frisbee down at Boulevard Park, jazz night every Tuesday at Boundary Bay Brewery, with kayak roll session beforehand when my knee was still good, sitting on the fridge eating ice cream out of the container late in the night with everyone saying "I should be studying right now", sitting on the roof drinking wine coolers : ) and talking about our summers....so many good memories. It's hard to start over when you have something so good.
I think some of it is just laziness. Making friends is hard work, especially when you know that you have rad ones, who you have already convinced to like you, back home. You know, it's not easy persuading people to like a strange girl like me, they think I'm strange.
I had a couple restless nights last week worried about next year. Then I just happened to read in Psalms, "But you O Lord, be not far off; O my strength, come quickly to help me" (22:19) and "I will fear no evil for you are with me." (23:4) I forgot the big picture. I forgot, that my joy in life or feeling of purpose isn't dependent on my situation or whether people like me or not. And maybe it won't all work out the way I want it to, but that's ok as long as I let God guide me.
So as I was reminded of that, my stress and fear have diminished some, replaced by more excitement.
After sorting through all my things, deciding what to take what not to, what to have handy to mail later, and laying it all out on the spare bed, I packed everything into my two bags. I was afraid I would go over the 50lb per bag limit but I must have learned something from my last year abroad, because I can take almost 20 lb more of stuff if I want to! I packed far better that I thought. That means I can take some more teaching materials and refernces and maybe some of my ice climbing gear or snowboard boots. I am going to repack everything today and redistribute the weight, but knowing that everything will fit with extra room is such a weight off my shoulders (ha ha, but really)!
I'm really sad because there are quite a few people that I was hopingto see this last week or so that I didn't get to. I wanted to go to Bellingham and down near Portland/Vancouver. If I didn't get to see you, trust me, it's not that I didn't want to, I would have very much loved to see all of you guys, but alas, it will have to wait for another time. So know that I love you all, and that my love is not diminished by my not coming to see you. Although, I feel like a bad person. This is where I come in and say that you should come visit me in Austria : ) OK? All the cool people are doing it. 9 out of 10 Becca's recommend travelling to Austria for good health (the 10th Becca is an alter-ego, so you can pretty much ignore her).
Tomorrow I will fly from Tri-Cities to Seattle to the other Washington (DC) spend a week in Virginia and North Caroline with my mom's family, then on Monday the 10th I'll fly to New Hampshire for a week for Jon and Kristin's wedding, then on the 17th at 10pm I'll fly out of Boston to Frankfurt, Germany and then to Innsbruck where I will take a train to Landeck.
Woo Hoo!
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